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No one is born with self- confidence.  We have to develop self-confidence. So, what exactly is self-confidence? defines self- confidence as realistic confidence in one’s judgment, ability, power, etc. In other words, self-esteem is the power within yourself.  Now I am not the most confident person in the world. I know how to develop confidence when I am feeling low. It is easy to walk around and feel like you don’t have any self-confidence. But it is essential to realize that if you don’t have confidence in yourself, no one will.

Self- confidence is feeling good about yourself. Also, being self- confident means that you feel good about reaching the goals you want to achieve. Of course, self- confidence can be knock down just as easy as you can build. In today’s world, your tenacity may be shaken by seeing someone you think looks better than you. Or someone you think is more successful than you. Sometimes we can tear our own self- confidence down by being our own worst critic. Remember that self-confidence begins in your mind. Not having faith can make it hard for you to be successful.  Being confident can inspire others.  It makes people believe you are a strong leader. There are two main things that people must have to contribute to self-confidence. And they are self-esteem and self-efficacy. I have some tips that have helped me to develop confidence.

Learn New Skills

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You are building your skills in an area that you want to be an expert in or learn more about will improve self-confidence.  Go ahead and take some classes in something that interests you. Remember, don’t give up. Sometimes when I try something new and it doesn’t go as I envisioned. I tend to want to give up. But that is not the correct answer. Unfortunately, that is my inner critic trying to set me up for failure.  Of course, you must remember what your goals are.  See exactly where you want to be. Then you will be motivated to keep going.

Accept Self- Doubt

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Hey, it’s okay to doubt yourself. Just don’t stop trying new things. Remember, nothing happens if you don’t work for it.  For example, let’s say you’re a procrastinator. You have confidence, but then you tell yourself, “I’ll do it tomorrow.” Well, tomorrow turns into next week. Then next week becomes next month etc. Unfortunately, this is your self -doubt playing tricks on you. Of course, I know this feeling all too well.  I still struggle with it.

It’s okay because I am a work in progress, and so are you.  Facing your fears is the best thing for you, too do.  I know you’re afraid that you are going to mess up.  Or you think you’re going to embarrass yourself.  That is perfectly normal. At least you know that you tried. However, if you must sing, dance, or speak in front of a broad audience, practice, invite some friends or family members over and practice in front of them.  This article here explains explicitly three ways to face your fears.

Eating Healthy

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Taking care of yourself is number one.  You can’t feel self-confident about yourself if you don’t eat right. Make sure you drink plenty of water. Eating fresh fruits and vegetables can help boost your confidence by making you look good as well as feel great. Whether you decide to be a vegan, vegetarian, or if you are like me and love to eat an occasional steak once in a while, go for it, just remember that you must eat healthy foods. That includes portion size. So many people eat healthily and wonder why they are still gaining weight; it is all because of the amount of food you are eating.

Keep A Good Attitude

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Keeping the right attitude is a challenge for me.  Those negative thoughts can make you feel low.  Change your mindset. Think positive; tell yourself that you can do it.  Use challenges as a stepping stone to move you further in life. 

Get Organized and Stay Organized

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Life can be hectic. Being organized makes me feel in charge.  I love knowing where everything is. Organizing may take some time to do and practice to stay that way. I have some things organized.  One of the main things I have arranged is my purse.  Yes, my handbag.  Ladies, I know you know my pain when it comes to a messy purse.  I had to find a way to organize things.  So, what I did was put my healthcare cards into a small sandwich bag.

Set Goals

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Sometimes people set goals that are too challenging or impossible to reach.  It is vital to set simple goals in the beginning. If the goals you set are too challenging, they can be overwhelming.  Not being able to reach your goals can bring down your self-confidence.  I set small daily goals for myself. Here is one of my samples:

Clean the coat closet.

Organize the books on the bookshelf.

Exercise for 30 minutes

Play with my two younger daughters for an hour.

However, I have learned that it is a good idea not to put this list into a time frame. For example, I used to put a time on this schedule.  I would be repeatedly thrown off my schedule because other situations would arrive. Then I would miss some of my goals.

Picture Yourself There

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Let’s say you want a single-family house, but you keep on thinking I’ll never get it.  Guess what, your right, you will never get it.  The reason why you will never get it is that you keep thinking negatively.  You have to picture yourself in a single-family home continuously.  No matter what your bank account or credit says, you have to imagine yourself already there and focus on achieving your goal.  Of course, this works with any purpose you have in your heart. Don’t stop yourself before you get, instead picture yourself already there.


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Remember, self-care is not being selfish; you have to take care of yourself first. Self-confidence is a mixture of social, physical, and mental health.  First, you have to look good to build confidence.  Looking good without a doubt makes you feel good.  Dress for success, and you will feel successful.  Of course, we all have those days when we get out of bed and don’t feel like dressing well.  Well snap out of it; you want to be successful, make sure you are taking care of yourself.

That includes getting proper sleep and exercise. You will feel more confident when you take care of yourself.

Help Others

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Yes, I said it help others.

No one knows what a person may be going through helping them will make you feel good about yourself. Feeling good about yourself is a lift to your self-confidence. It also makes us feel grateful for what we have.

Support Group

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Surround yourself with people who believe in you.  Make sure they are there to build you up, not tear you down.  Some people who are in your support group may not belong there. If they are putting out negative vibes, then get rid of them. Having support makes you believe in yourself even more.

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